My dad, Apper.

It’s nearly midnight, but I can’t let this day pass without writing something here to mark the end of the first year since my dear Pop died at St Nicholas Hospice. I will slow down on the pathos after this, but I would like to thank those true and dear friends (and even strangers) who have made this year bearable.


It’s been incredibly life-giving to read the things that people have written about my dad throughout this year– including his friends and family from Hazleton, PA, where dad grew up and cherished.


I am grateful for everyone who reached out, even in the smallest way – and if I didn’t reply I apologise. In the early months it was too much to write responses, although I managed to inundate my social media with photos and posts of dad.


I only have a minute before midnight so let me end on this poem that my friend Angeline sent me just after dad died:

I have felt this a few times this year. Anyway. I love you dad!

About ten days or so

After we saw you dead

You came back in a dream.

“I’m all right now” you said.

And it was you, although

You were fleshed out again:

You hugged us all round then,

And gave your welcoming beam.

How like you to be kind,

Seeking to reassure.

And, yes, how like my mind

To make itself secure.

(The Reassurance – Thom Gunn)

Sent by Angeline

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